bütfukt.

"But I don't get it though, about year ago, you said my gear is wack, nigga, now my gear is dope? I guess it goes full circle like a cheerio, 'cause you rocking what I was rocking like a year ago! You said my chain was lame then you go and get a rope?"

-The Cool Kids

So APPARENTLY my favorite boot (the one that excommunicated me from anyone popular in highschool) is now an irresistibly hot fashion item. Now, I KNOW that this is the way it always goes... Everybody thinks you look like a loser, until some huge fashion mogul decides that your look is the "new look for the summer", and then everybody just wants to talk to you about your motherfucking cocksucking trendy-ass boots. I'm not bitter.

But it does suck when it finally happens to you.

That being said, I'm takin' it back this summer, bootfuck style. SO, I digs out my old pair of 14i Cherry Docs, only to be painfully reminded that they ARE in fact going on 6 years old now, and don't look a day younger. Check this noise:

Cracked toe joints (DIY ventilation system):


Fraying heel and blown sole (hidey-hole for drugs):


A few nice chunks out of the leather (if you could've seen the side of my leg after this particular longboarding incident, this wouldn't look so bad):

Yes, I longboarded in Docs. Bite me.

Looks like it's DOCSHOPPIN' time! This time around, I'm doing it right. Having tried both 8i and 14i models in the past, I'm sticking with the 10i this time. The 8s just looked like construction boots (minus being CSA approved), and with the 14s I usually just ended up looping the lace around my calf and knotting at the 10th eye anyway. BUT... That's not the only improvement!! This year, I'm stepping up my game, and getting BRITISH Docs instead of Chinese ones. The extra little bit of dinero means NO MORE leather that feels like cardboard, soles that lose their bounce, or fraying yellowstitch. AND NO MORE CHERRY. That's right.... This time, it's gonna be...

OXBLOOD QUILON.

Klaus Maertens would be rolling in his grave if he knew how badly these are going to be abused by me.

Now I've just gotta pull two Benjamins outta my ass. Bahaha.